Day 23: Things My English Teacher Didn’t Teach Me (Or Any Teacher, Really)

Let’s face it, I’ve been in school for the past 16 years of my life, so school has been my life and I have been learning a lot of things about a lot of things. And because I attend a Christian school, I have learned many faith based things as well. And because my faith based school gave me opportunity to travel, I learned much about the world. But I will say that there are some valuable life things I did not learn in a classroom.

For instance, I’m 90% sure I could intubate a patient because I have seen it done 7,000 times on Grey’s Anatomy. If that’s not legitimate medical knowledge than I don’t know what is.

More importantly, I have learned from an older sister that spanx and a pair of high heels make your waist look skinnier and your legs look better. These tidbits come in handy when you’re sitting at a wedding (minus the “plus one”) eating three pieces of wedding cake and sulking that you’re almost 23, a college graduate, and still single as a piece of Kraft cheese. Of course, that’s never happened to me…

I’ve learned that a perm is never a good idea, plucking your eyebrows must happen weekly, Vaseline is good for the lips, a peanut butter milkshake never hurt anyone, Coldplay can move one to tears, babies always smell good, and an Instagram selfie with 30+ likes can boost self-esteem for a week.

Try learning that in a classroom.