a tribute

I used to wonder why God led me to a youth ministry internship in Mississippi. I was in Greece when He placed the interest on my heart, and the first time I voiced my interest to a friend, she passed on an email address for a youth minister looking for interns. A few emails later, I had the job.

I think it surprised people. I’m not a youth ministry major. It surprised me a bit, too. One short week after coming home to America, I moved to Mississippi for the summer. More months away from my family, more of me finding, stretching, and growing myself.

And while I had an incredible summer, and while I hoped to have helped teenagers on their spiritual walk, I still wondered. Why that summer, why that church, and what difference did I make?

I met Connor my first day on the job. When Jared, the youth minister, met me in the parking lot to greet me, Connor was waiting at the door. I thought he was goofy.

Later that evening, a group of us went to a Memphis Redbirds baseball game. Connor was there, and I learned that he had a brain tumor. You would have never known. His chemotherapy didn’t cause any hair loss, and he was a wild and energetic guy.

Throughout the summer, I realized how truly special Connor is. He never complained about his disease. In fact, he bragged about his chemo days. “I get to watch Sportscenter all day,” he said.

I went to visit Connor in a hospice facility today. After battling cancer for years, and after countless options tried, he is preparing to meet the Lord. As I drove back to school today, I tried to wrap my mind around what it would mean to die at the age of 20. I cried for the things that Connor will never get to experience.

But then I opened to my favorite book of the Bible, 1 Peter, and read “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever.”

Then, I stopped crying, because I realized all that Connor will soon experience. He will soon see Jesus. His health will soon be restored, and he will be strong.

Now I know why God led me to Southaven, Mississippi. To minister to teenagers, yes, and I pray that I did. But I think, mostly, it was to know Connor. In the short time that I knew him, he taught me much about life and true faith. I am a better person for knowing him in the last months of his precious life.

While this time is difficult, I am grateful to God for his good and perfect will…